Every time I turn on my computer to write, the first thing I do is turn on my Pandora and this time when I did “Like You’ll Never See Me Again” by Alicia Keys was the first song to start playing. If you’ve heard the song, then you understand what I mean when I say that I instantly felt the tune of it deep into my soul and of course was inspired much quicker than I normally am. It’s a good day!
So last night I was on the phone with my boyfriend and was talking about how bored I am with life right now. He’s such a sweetheart, he actually sat and brainstormed with me about what hobbies I can begin to alleviate the lack of motivation I had and this blog was the first thing that came to mind. He knew that I have a blog about being single, but we hadn’t quite delved in to it because it’s a bit awkward. How do I explain that I want to write a blog about being single when he and I are seeing where things go? This has been my constant struggle every time I start seeing someone but he had the best idea! He told me that I should start writing about what it’s like in the early stages of being in a relationship… and why the hell wouldn’t I? So no, I am not quitting the blog and yes I’m sure the occasional post about being single will come up (I can’t just forget what I learned). This blog keeps me sane, and it’s definitely not time to let it go.
I figure that you’re all wondering who he is, right? Well his name is Daniel and I really wonder what good things I did in my life to earn the exact man I have been asking for all of these years! Now you may remember the blog post I wrote a few months ago called “5 Non-Negotiables” and if not you can find it right here. Well Daniel and I had met last July and we dated for a few months but didn’t ever make things official. After those few months I had wanted to make things exclusive but he had a lot of things going on and felt he couldn’t give me the time I deserved. I respected that, but I was hurt and wondering what went wrong. I quickly moved past that because my life was crazy at the time while trying to finalize the legalities of my dads passing and getting settled into my promotion at work. We didn’t talk for months and then just last week he asked me to dinner spontaneously. I agreed, because I’m always curious when an ex reaches out but I’ll admit, I had a feeling that this wasn’t just “catching up”. Well, I was right.
While at dinner he dropped quite the bomb on me and came out and told me that he had things figured out in his life, and he wanted to make things exclusive between he and I right there. At first I was completely taken aback. How could we possibly just act like nothing happened?! I wondered what I’d tell my family and friends, and then I wondered if it was dangerous to just jump into things so I told him we could ease into things and date again. Who the fuck was I kidding?
If you know me then you know that I never half ass anything, and my love life is included. Now what I pride about myself is that it takes someone pretty amazing to catch my attention which is why I’ve been single for more than two years. I kind of wondered if I had too high of standards, which I wrote about here but now I realize that I was silly to ever wonder that. I was patient, picky, and why would I half ass being with this man who is every single thing I’ve ever asked for. He meets every single one of my 5 non-negotiables so well that he actually said to me “I know it sounds crazy but you’re exactly what I want and when I want something I go after it”… UM, DID I NOT SAY THAT WAS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING TO ME?! I am still flabbergasted. Now I am still trying to be a little cautious, but I’ve gotten to know Daniel pretty well and I am pretty confident that his authenticity, caring demeanor, and positivity is exactly what I need in my life.
Needless to say, we jumped into things quickly but I don’t anticipate things going south. Now here’s my advice for those of you in the early stages of a relationship; be with the guy who makes you feel absolutely comfortable being yourself. In my pasts relationships I have constantly wondered “what does he think of me” or “am I talking too much”? Maybe I’ve gotten disgustingly comfortable with myself, but not once have I been self conscious with Daniel. I am constantly open, vulnerable, and myself with him and though that may sound scary to some but it’s actually so relieving. Imagine the tense shoulders, self doubt, and constant over thinking just disappearing. That’s when you know that you have something pretty good in front of you. It’s in those moments when you really get to know the deepest parts of people so if this early on we are completely real with each other, than we are simply setting ourselves up for success.
As I near the end of this post, I began to wonder to myself “I should probably check with Daniel before just writing about our business for the world to see” even though we had already talked about it last night. I shot him a text asking and these were his words, “Of course talk about us as much as you want and how you really feel about it too! Write without holding anything back”. A man who understands how important writing is to me? I think I’ll keep this one around.
Have the best night you guys!